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Maybe you could include her in activities that would allow her to be more active without making it obvious that is what you are doing. The doctors have confirmed he has brain damage I think he is suffering with short term memory loss too.
She is totally wrapped up in her self-pity and treats my dad terribly. I have been telling her that she needs to stay active and keep moving so that she doesn't become immobile.
Plus, he has been sad a lot of the time and emotional which is expected, but I don't want his saddens to get in the way. It affected his L side, cognition, and a little speech. From wheelchair to just having a brace on his L leg. He walks with a cane but has no use of his left arm. His processing speed and his attention span is severely affected and he has attempted and failed to get his drivers license 3 times.
I'm also trying to deal with all of this because my mom doesn't handle situations well and didn't have a good childhood and had a lot of issues and so she doesn't really know how to love me the right way sometimes if that makes sense. My mom was trying to move his little table over by him but I was in the way and she said move and I said excuse me would be a nicer word and then my dad said you could be a little nicer and my mom blew up. I still keep helping him with eye therapy and cognitive classes because he is in severe denial as well.
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You could also post your question on a caregiver support group forum and see what other people have done in this situation that was helpful. He hates me for no reason and put me through a divorce from Hell for two years. My dad has suffered a stroke a few days ago caused by a blood clot.